Poetry, Music and Art

How I Express My Thoughts and Feelings.

My garden of birds and colours
One day in early March 2013, when I was feeling tense, my brain was in a spin cycle and I could hardly hold in the storm, the only way I could express my thoughts with my communication friend Beth was to make a special list of birds.
Then with Heidi's help, we made a painting of 21 of these birds, seen in my back garden as if through a large window.
I said: I think the birds in the garden might be a rainbow of colours I could name them in order of alphabet. (But I couldn't think of birds beginning with U or X).

Can you name all of the different types of birds?

American tree bird sparrow. He is bracing for winter with his furry red cap.
American gold finch. Yellow like the sun.
Barn swallow for David. Shiny black head--does he glow in the dark?--and a red spot like an Indian lady.
Cardinal is red as blood and roses and I can see them in the snow.
Duck. I think of quacking and green heads.
Eagle. I think the eagle is strong and in charge of the skies Black and white.
Flycatcher sounds unique. It is olive green and small and perching way up high.
Goose, yes of course, with lovely necks and nasty droppings.
Heron is long legged and long beaks with grey blue feathers wading in the river. Big beaks that skim the water.
Indigo bunting. Indigo is beautiful blue isn’t it?
Jays are blue and sometimes other colours. Blue jays are bossy and big.
Kestrel-orange and chubby with freckles on his chest.
Loon--it is on our dollar. Black and white like a swimming zebra.
Mockingbird is small and lovely white yellow.
Nighthawk is brown with lines. It gets the mice and has long wings.
Osprey. I like the sound of that. It has a golden beady eye.
Pheasant the colourful; chicken-looking; fast runner.
Quail is exotic with plume feather atop her head.
Robin with its red breast.
Shrike. It is endangered and I want it in my garden. Silver slim and white.
Thrush sounds nice. What does it look like? White belly sounds like jelly.
Vireo with red eyes; it can glow in the rain and dark.
Woodpecker, hairy. Cute with his red feather on the side of his head.
Yellow throat sounds like a disease.
Zenaida-also known as a mourning dove.

Can you identify most of these birds in the painting?

My Green Man painting shows a forest and a man who is green and of the earth. It represents to me trying to stay connected to the earth. I am peering out from my own forest.


Sunshine (March 5, 2010)

Sunshine brings me a smile.
Sunshine warms my face.
Sunshine gives me strength.
Sunshine provides a light.
Sunshine gives me hope.
Sunshine warms my heart.
Sunshine builds my confidence.
Sunshine provides a path.
Sunshine gives me peace.
Sunshine is a blessing.
Sunshine makes me smile.

My Thoughts About Gardens (25 July 2007)
I like gardens because they are peaceful to walk in.
My perfect garden would have the green leaves of plants and the colours of flowers.
I like the fragrances of gardens.
Nothing bothers me there.

When the weather is nice (23 May 2007)
I feel my spirits
soar like the birds.
Like floating clouds
I drift along
When the weather is nice,
my own clouds clear.
I hope for sunny days and cool nights,
so I can feel nice weather inside and out.

Blessings on the land (4 June 2008)
Blessings we receive
with loving our land:
Our land also receives
blessings from us loving it.
I feel connected to the planet
When I work in my garden.
My garden needs my attention
And I need what the garden gives us.
My garden gives us flowering plants
to please our eyes and nose,
and herbs to please our tongues.
I think I need the sense of peace
the garden gives me, the gardener.

Seasons Changing (AB, 4 June 2010)
Seasons are a work in progress.
Seasons are unpredictable
and ever changing.
Life is also unpredictable like seasons.
It is expected and welcome,
but never certain what will unfold.
Seasons are a gift
just like my life.
Seasons give us
new things and growth,
but as life changes
so do the seasons.
Seasons are brief
but full of potential for their time.
Seasons bring new life
and new opportunities,
but change puts a
new experience in place.
Seasons are like our relationships:
they are ever changing and
dependable at same time.
Seasons bring new life to old,
just like life.
Seasons are ever changing.

Ode to Autumn (24 September 2008)

I love autumn.
My body loves it too.
My mind is clear
as the breeze
that blows the leaves
down to the ground.
My eyes love the sights
as the colours change.
My ears look forward
to hearing the leaves
crunch and crinkle
under my feet.
My mind remembers
that in the fall
we eat squash and pumpkins.
In the autumn, I am glad
of the break from hot summer.
My feet are planted in this season
and I hope I can hold on to it.

Hoping for the best (AB, 7 Mar 2012) I have reason to hope for the future:
that life will be full of light and love and friendship.
I have reason to hope
because it is already the truth of my life.
I am surrounded, circled and consoled
by my friends and loved ones.
I am already held in high regard
and given respect
in ways unknown to autistics in the past.
I am already listened to for my opinion
and looked to for friendship.
I have hope for a future that is the best
because I am on a good path
that I can return to at times
when I must lie down on the side.
I feel loved and I feel held
and I have reason to hope
my life will continue along this way.

The meaning in life (AB 15 Feb 2012)
Life is mysterious, isn't it?
We always seek answers;
we have so many questions.
I know you are a seeker
of truth and beauty
and I a seeker of meaning.
We can meet in the middle
and paint pictures with the answers we find.
I think we can have a meeting of our minds
and a meeting of our hearts.
I like to connect with you and I hope you do too.

My family--foundation for my life (AB 3 Aug 2013 (j))
I want to tell the people I love
that they are an important part of who I am.
My ancestors have been the foundation
for this sturdy house of love.
The makings of a good foundation
don’t only need mortar
but a good frame and model.
The Bloomfields give me a framework of
determination, hard work, strength,
caring and positive attitude.
Along with the mind
of great men and women in our family
comes our sense of humour.
The Bloomfields’ love of the green landscape
goes way back.
I love the honour for our land
and keeping it alive and healthy,
that comes from my background
My family is a mix of young and old,
not only related by blood but by strings of friendship.
Some of my greatest mentors have been my family.
I have learned the lesson of perseverance and patience
that has given me acceptance for myself and others.
My family is the foundation for my life.
Without these people I have an empty home.
My family continues to grow,
with new people being introduced
and I welcome them to Home Bloomfield.
I welcome them to my family.
Being part of this home
means a commitment
to me and the family.
So don’t take it on
unless you’re ready
to be part of the family.
I have many family:
all my friends could be listed;
the family is endless.

Opening the Taps (AB 6 Nov 2013)
My brain is like a water faucet:
when it is open,
words and feelings pour out of me;
and then it is closed and I shut off.

Nothing helps to open the taps
like being with you.
I feel open when you sit down
and invite me to speak my mind.
If the faucet is stuck
you grease it with your encouraging words.
and when I need to shut off you let me.
Sometimes it is slow to get flowing
like in the winter when things
start to freeze.
Then you chip away the ice
in a way that is neither mean
nor tentative.

My brain is saying yes thank you
and I will tell you what
is in my heart.
My brain is full to the brim
but I need my writing partner
to help open the faucet,
like I need partners to run
and to work in the garden.

Does this mean you are a plumber
or someone who knows
about water faucets?
You keep your brain open to me
and I think when you invite me
to talk there is a coupling of our minds
and the words come flowing.
Not always but when it is working
it is a monumental thing
and I am grateful for these moments.

I wonder about you (AB 9 Apr 2014)

I never used to wonder
what it was like to be you.
I always knew I was different;
I always wanted you to learn
what I was like inside.
The part about you having
things I might be curious about
is a new experience for me.

I think my conversations
have been focused
on me as the subject.
I am learning to wonder
what is going on inside you.
It is a new thing
for me to wonder
about you
who I do not really know.

You are a person in the blur
of the greater world
and if I did not know you,
you had not existed for me.
If I cannot see past my circle
I could not connect
and you were not distinct
or separate from the world.

I now wonder
what makes people tick,
and that the universe is made up
of you and you and you
and a million others like you.
I have so many people
to meet and learn about.
The world is
a large place indeed.